Love Is Not For The Faint-Hearted
by Isa'sWritings
Summary: "Okay, so maybe he had overreacted a bit. Scratch that, Kurt knew he had overreacted." In the days following their fight, Kurt analyses what led them to their current situation and why Blaine had decided to lie to him in the first place. Meanwhile, their fight didn't leave Blaine unaffected either. (Reaction fic for 5x20, contains spoilers.)


First reaction fic ever. It was partly inspired by a prompt I read that actually applied to episode 5x16 (Tested). The original prompt was about Blaine (almost) passing out because of his diet or eating problems or something like that after what happened in that episode. The story below came into existence because I remembered the prompt wrongly and applied it to 5x20 instead (and made it a reaction fic to give the story more body).

This fic is sort of a missing scene of the episode, but AU.

Enjoy!

**Warning:** spoilers for 5x20.

**Disclaimer:** Seriously, would anyone actually believe me if I claimed to own Glee or its characters? I don't think so.

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**Love Is Not For The Faint-Hearted.**

Okay, so maybe he had overreacted a bit. Scratch that, Kurt _knew_ he had overreacted.

In his own defence, Blaine's confession had felt like a double smack in the face at the time, hurting worse than being hit with five slushies at once – and, yes, he had first-hand experience. The first smack was caused by the fact that Blaine had lied to him, of course. When they had got back together, they had had a lengthy discussion about how trust was important to maintain a healthy relationship. Kurt wouldn't hold the cheating incident over Blaine's head anymore, but instead trust him not to do it again. But Blaine should also trust that Kurt wouldn't just stop loving him all of a sudden or leave him for someone better just like that.

Of course, Blaine hadn't hesitated to swear that his cheating was a mistake he would never make again and that he'd learned his lesson once and for all. And Kurt knew he meant it. But Kurt also knew how insecure Blaine was, how he was always striving to be perfect because he was secretly afraid that he wouldn't be good enough if he didn't reach the unattainably high standards he'd set for himself. In that aspect, he was sort of the opposite of Rachel, who was so sure of her own talent and ambitious enough that, when it came down to it, she would most likely choose her career over the people around her, confident she was strong enough to make it on her own. Blaine, on the other hand, needed people around him to support and love him. He knew he was a good singer because others told him so, but sometimes he just needed someone he could lean on and to give him a little push in the right direction every once in a while. And, similarly, he needed to hear he deserved the love he received and that he was good enough just as he was.

Which brought Kurt to the conclusion that Blaine had most likely lied to him to keep him happy, scared that Kurt would leave otherwise.

However, if Kurt had to be honest, Blaine's insecurities weren't solely to blame for his lying. Kurt knew he had a jealous streak, which had already reared its ugly head a few times before in the past. It wasn't that he wasn't happy for Blaine. No, it was just this small – or maybe not so small – part of him that envied Blaine for his talent combined with his natural charm that just drew everyone in effortlessly. Kurt was talented as well, but, in comparison to Blaine, he also had to work very hard for every little bit of success he met with and he was passed over more often than not.

So, of course he had been excited to be in the showcase with Blaine. And who could blame him? This was a great opportunity for the both of them. But, instead, he was still shoved aside. The disappointment of hearing that confirmed once again hurt worse than the fact that Blaine had lied to him.

In a way, Kurt could understand why his fiancé had kept the truth from him. If he'd been in Blaine's place, he might have lied to himself as well. And, come to think of it, he sort of had by believing it. Under normal circumstances, if he hadn't been so blinded by his ambition, he probably would've seen right through the deception; Blaine had never been that good of a liar.

Kurt gave up pretending he was studying, gathered his books and swiftly left the library, finally having sorted out his feelings after days of brooding. He was still a bit mad at Blaine for lying – and rightfully so, in his opinion –, but figured it was time to put his pride aside and let Blaine out of the doghouse. He needed to have an adult conversation with his fiancé to make sure there would be no more lying in their very long future together.

But first he had to find him, of course. Which wasn't so hard after all, as it turned out. He found him in the same room they'd had their fight in and where Blaine had spent most of his time for the past two weeks, rehearsing for his showcase. That very room had sort of become the NYADA equivalent of McKinley's choir room; somehow, they always ended up there.

Blaine wasn't on the small stage set up in the back or sitting behind the piano as Kurt had been expecting. Instead, when Kurt stepped into the room, the younger boy was standing next to the piano with his back to the open doorway. Actually, looking more closely, he noticed Blaine was leaning on it rather heavily, as if he were afraid he wouldn't be able to stay upright if he dared loosen his white-knuckled grip on the edge of the piano.

"Blaine? Are you okay?"

He quickly went to stand next to his fiancé, laying a hand on his back in support. Blaine's eyes were clenched shut and Kurt could see beads of sweat on his far too pale face. He was taking deep breaths, as though trying to stave of a bout of nausea.

"Blaine?" The freshman opened his eyes for a moment and glanced sideways. "What's wrong?"

Blaine swallowed a few times before answering.

"... I feel dizzy."

"Okay," Kurt said, immediately taking charge, "why don't you sit down for a minute."

He didn't fail to notice how Blaine eyed the distance to the nearest chair with a doubtful expression.

"... I was going to...," he mumbled. "Didn't think I could make it."

Change of plans, Kurt decided. If Blaine felt bad enough to admit that, he must be on the verge of passing out.

"Forget the chair." He wrapped his arm more firmly around Blaine's back, grabbing his arm with his free hand. "Let go of the piano, honey. I've got you."

After a bit more urging from Kurt, Blaine finally relinquished his tight hold, trusting his fiancé to take his weight. The older boy gently guided Blaine to lie down on the floor and undid the top buttons of his shirt for him. Then he went to open one of the many windows, returning to Blaine's side with a bottle of water which he used to wet a clean handkerchief. Blaine had thrown an arm over his eyes, but moved it when Kurt started wiping his face and neck with the cool fabric, keeping his eyes closed.

"Do you think you're going to throw up?"

"No."

"Okay."

They stayed there in silence for a while, until Blaine was breathing more calmly and he opened his eyes again, although he still looked pale.

"Better?" Kurt asked in concern.

"Yeah, a bit," Blaine nodded.

"What happened?"

"I don't know. I was practising and I just felt faint all of a sudden."

"Just like that?"

"Yeah."

Kurt looked him over sceptically. He knew there must be a reason for Blaine's sudden dizzy spell. And the answer might be found in some of his fiancé's more unhealthy habits when he felt overwhelmed.

"Have you been eating?"

"Of course," Blaine answered.

"When was the last time?" Kurt insisted, knowing how Blaine would sometimes lose his appetite in times of too much stress.

"This morning," Blaine snapped. "You can ask Sam if you don't believe me."

Kurt checked his watch.

"Blaine, it's past five in the afternoon."

"No way." Blaine threw a glance at his own watch, blushing in embarrassment when he saw Kurt was right. "I didn't realise..."

Kurt helped him sit up and started digging through his satchel once he had Blaine leaning against the piano.

"Here, eat this," he said, holding out a granola bar. "And when you're done, we're going home. I think you've rehearsed enough for today."

They didn't talk that day. Even when Blaine was feeling better, Kurt felt it wasn't the right time after what had happened. Their adult conversation could wait another day.

**The end.**

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Let me know what you think and I'll be one very happy writer :)


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